Just curious if anyone has any tips for me. I have a daughter, and anytime I open a pad of paper, or crack out the clay, work on music production, she wants to do it with me. Right now she's a grade A clinger (lol) It's fine, I like playing and "arting" around with her, but the truth is, without giving her a computer or phone to use I don't get a lot done, and I get mad at myself for plopping her down with a phone. How do you guys do it?
Hmm, I’m not a parent but you can try “doing the same thing but separate.” Like if you’re drawing, she can draw too, but without your instruction. Just two people being quiet and making art. Of course this probably wouldn’t work with a much younger kid, they don’t really like doing things by themselves sometimes. It’s worth a shot though. You can always show each other what you’ve done at the end of your art session.
For a good while, we'd just do stuff together and that was how it went. i would have to wait for bedtime to really get into anything on my own--or i had to wait for my wife to take her out to the park, go for a walk, see friends, etc.
While Melissa and I don't have kids and both work at home even that can be a challenge. It all comes down to stating your needs while properly planning together time and being true to your word. I recently got in contact with an old toy maker friend of mine and we caught up with all that went down over the pandemic. It was a really long and interesting talk on the dynamics and codependences that happened with family life and the troubles and trauma that remain. I need a part 2 with him on that. As a kid I read in a book by one of my favorite artists Patrick Woodroffe about how he had a nearby shack separate from home where he was free to create unbothered by family life. It always stuck with me. Fine for the English countryside at the time, but it's a rare thing to get in the city without the overhead! For sure! It's a hard thing to navigate but can be achieved. And the fact you are considering it is the first step on making it work!
TMI incoming: My daughter has separation anxiety for sure, I've had substance abuse issues in the past and started drinking a lot after an a major accident (I was hit by an SUV) The pandemic didn't help either. Her mom and I separated and I spent a year getting my life together, stopped using all substances, worked getting healthy (working out jogging therapy etc) we've worked things out and are building a new life together. I love my family. I'm having a slow process getting things back on track, now that I'm blending them back in the mix. She doesn't want to be less than a foot away from me at all times. I never tell her something that I can't do, because "daddy always keeps his promises (it's a big deal)). I've been thinking about renting a studio apartment just for work. This is all kind of a new venture for me, I'm not pressed for time, but right now I also have to stay up till midnight just to get 4 hours of work in. I guess I should just be grateful for the time I get to spend with her, and remember that eventually kids don't want to hang out with mom and dad. I wake up everyday just grateful I'm alive; It's also hard when I work on an illustration for 20 hours and come home to it being creased and colored in with markers (lol true story).
Good on you making such an important comeback! Keep keepin’ on!!! I’m an illustrator as well, and I have a 5 year old. He's now in kinder, which gives me some time during the day, but he still comes to the studio a lot with me. I keep all of my serious work out of his reach as much as possible, and always have stuff within reach that he knows he can “help papa” with. When we’re in the studio together I make a big deal out of each of us working on separate projects (he has his own little station with a desk), and giving each other advice so we can “get things done”. It’s great because he gets a sense of accomplishment and of “being like papa”. I get the joy that comes from that, plus I get a few things done myself.
Thank you, yeah my daughter is definitely worth more to me than having a drink.. Her new phrase is " I bored lets color " I wonder what the work process was like for the family at Axe cop?
Screw the work, man. Enjoy the time you have bc it’s not going to come back. Just include her in as much you can and fill that lil person with memories and good times with her papa. Art will still be there down the line. If you can squeeze some time here and there, do it, but I feel the puzzle here is working out how much you are content with getting done while being a present parent. It sounds like you’re putting in the work, so at least you know your head is in the right place. Congrats on all the progress and I’m sure y’all find a project that’s interesting for both and scratches your arting itch. From my end: Since we had our lil blessing my art career is in hibernation and there isn’t a museum show or publishing that can fill my cup of joy and wonderment like the lil gatiio does. Kids are the best creative partners
I already deeply admire so many of you guys and gals on here for your incredible talents. It truly is unbelievably impressive to me how deep and broad the creativity and passion of this board reaches. Coming from someone who is very much on the opposite end of the spectrum, it is a skill I deeply respect and admire. Sadly, was not able to have children, but definitely a lot of other 'stuff' in life has really hammered home how much balance is key to maintaining sanity, but more than that it is about recognising what is actually important in life. And for this reason I seriously echo gatiio's thoughts; be there and do your papa thing, the rest will sort itself out. Hate to sound like the oldie, but one thing you come to realise is how quickly time passes, and once it's gone, you have only those memories and the impact of what you did to carry forward. Make the most of it while you can. Of course it is made difficult when/if your living income depends on your art, but there's ways around it I am sure. Really happy you have managed to get the track straightened out; I am confident you'll find the right mix and be a great dad, friend, and fellow artist to your amazing daughter. Creativity and love will bring on more of the same in her. Keep on being there whenever you can and giving her everything she needs.
I think Gatillo hit it on the head, maybe I'm thinking about it wrong.. I'm a teacher at this point, my time needs to be spent teaching her how to do it vs how am I going to do it. A year feels way different to me now than it did a decade ago. My child is the next generation of me, I hope that she figures it all out a little better than I did.
I have a 2 year old and a nearly 4 year old. And while it’s true they should take priority and you have a very short window to experience “little kids” I find you do need to take time for yourself to stay mentally healthy, especially with 2, the dynamic is very different than 1 and much more chaotic. I don’t know if I would have been able to accomplish anything in the past few years if it weren’t for covid creating an environment of remote work, and being able to be home all day and find art breaks during business hours. Aside from that, for you, considering day care/pre-school, even a part time schedule could give you some time alone. Also, consider using an iPad as your primary tool, nomad for sculpting and procreate for illustration work. Both are very nice pieces of creative software for a “to go” mobile device. The benefit of working like this is it’s very easy to pick up for a few minutes and then put back down. It’s also just much quicker to create in than traditional mediums, so you achieve a lot more with limited time
